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Ebay Translations (copied)

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  • Ebay Translations (copied)

    I saw this post on the drummaker forum...thought you might get a kick out of it:


    "FOR ALL YOU EBAY GUYS OUT THERE HERE ARE A FEW EBAY DRUM/CYMBAL TRANSLATIONS:

    10. "IT BREAKS MY HEART TO HAVE TO PART WITH MY BELOVED DRUM/CYMBAL" MEANS: I CANT WAIT TO GET RID OF IT!

    9. "ONLY USED A FEW TIMES IN THE STUDIO" MEANS: A FEW TIMES IN THIS STUDIO, A FEW TIMES IN THAT STUDIO, HELD TOGETHER BY MASSIVE TAPE ADHESIVE RESIDUE.

    8. "MY LOSS, YOUR GAIN" MEANS: YOUR LOSS, MY GAIN!

    7. "LOW RESERVE" MEANS: MORE THAN I CAN GET ANYWHERE ELSE!

    6. "CYMBAL, NO CRACKS, OR KEY-HOLING" MEANS: THAT IS THE ONLY THING GOOD ABOUT IT,PLEASE BUY IT BEFORE IT BREAKS ON ME.

    5. "BUY IT NOW, FREE SHIPPING" MEANS: I NEED SOME CRACK, PLEASE HURRY UP!

    4. "NEW-OLD STOCK" MEANS, LOOK WHAT I FOUND BURRIED UNDER ALL OF MY BILL COLLECTION NOTICES, DIVORCE PAPERS, AND OTHER TRASH.

    3. "ONE OF A KIND" MEANS: IN A FEW DAYS AFTER MY AUCTION, SOME OTHER FREAK-OF-NATURE WILL SELL ONE FOR MUCH LESS.

    2. "10 DOLLARS FIXED SHIPPING" MEANS: 3 DOLLARS FOR SHIPPING, 7 DOLLARS FOR BEER AND CIGARETTES.

    1. "PLEASE EMAIL WITH ANY QUESTIONS" MEANS: DONT CALL OR WRITE, BECAUSE MY WIFE DOESNT KNOW THAT I AM DOING THIS, AND, IF SHE FINDS OUT SHE WILL SELL MY DRUMS ON EBAY, KICK ME OUT OF THE HOUSE, AND LEAVE ME FOR THE U.P.S. GUY WHO COMES BY THE HOUSE 3 TIME A DAY TO DROP OFF DRUM "CRAP"!"

  • #2
    lol

    ------------------
    http://mpcman.flappie.nl
    Music was my first love...

    Comment


    • #3
      Stop me if you've heard these before...
      self-depracating drummer humor!

      Q: What did the drummer get on his IQ test?
      A: Drool

      Q: How do you know if the drummer's riser is level?
      A: The drool comes out both sides of his mouth.

      Q: How do you know it's a drummer at your door?
      A: The knocking speeds up..and slows down.

      And finally...

      Q: What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend?

      A: Homeless!
      Boom Theory Spacemuffins
      TD6
      HDI Cymbals

      Comment


      • #4
        I learned to play bass and keyboards so that I could be a musician.

        Comment


        • #5
          Sepdrums:

          Great eBay Translations...(Now, every time I place an Ad, I'll be thinking of you...)

          Thanks A Bunch!!!

          Comment


          • #6
            How do you make a drummer's car more aerodynamic?

            Take the Domino's sign off the top of it!

            (Wait, a drummer with his own car???)

            I'm a drummer. I don't play the timpani! Hire a percussionist!!!

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            • #7
              What do drummers use as contraceptive?

              Their personality!

              My favourite is not a drum joke.

              What is the range of a Tuba?

              About 20 metres if thrown over arm

              Comment


              • #8
                Did you hear about the drummer who locked his keys in the car?

                It took him an hour to get the bass player out!
                Steve

                'I only ever quote myself - except when I quote someone else' - me

                , plenty of , and , , triggered acoustics, , and a plethora of PA blah blah freakin blah...I mean does anyone care about the specifics of pedals, speakers, processors, hardware or anything that I'm using?? :confused: Hmmm, maybe this is an appropriate place to mention that I tried out a new cymbal stand the other day...

                Comment


                • #9
                  Q: What do you call a drummer with 1/2 a brain?

                  A: A Genius

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